Tag Archives: Angleški vici

U are

“You are what you eat… ”
I need to eat a fit person!

Oscar

Roses are red, violets are glorious, don’t try to surprise Oscar Pistorius.

Criticism is not agreeable

Criticism may not be agreeable, but it is necessary. It fulfils the same function as pain in the human body. It calls attention to an unhealthy state of things.

Heaven and hell

Heaven is where the police are British, the chefs Italian, the mechanics German, the lovers French and it is all organized by Swiss.

Hell is where the police are German, the chefs British, the mechanics French, the lovers Swiss and it is all organized by Italians dude

5 modrih

1. Money cannot buy happiness, but it’s more comfortable to cry in a Mercedes than on a bicycle.

2. Forgive your enemy, but remember the bastard’s name.

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Oldies darilo za božič

Grandad: “When I was your age, all I’ve got for Christmas was an apple and a blackberry.

brawo

Boy: “WTF?!?!  A laptop and a mobile phone?!”

 

Malce tujih šal

What is 1,000 white people running down a hill?

Avalanche.

What is a 1,000 mexicans running down a hill?

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Audition

3 men (a Belgian, a German and a French) have an audition for a
new job in England. The interviewer tells them:
“OK, you’ll have to formulate a sentence with the 3 words: green, pink and yellow.”

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Men

1. WHY DO MEN BECOME SMARTER DURING SEX?

(because they are plugged into a genius)

2. WHY DON’T WOMEN BLINK DURING SEX?

(they don’t have enough time)
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